Real Estate | Bristow & Northern Virginia
Selling a home is emotional. It's also deeply personal, which is why so many sellers struggle with one simple but crucial piece of advice: leave the house when buyers come to see it.
To real estate agents, this advice feels like second nature. It's right up there with decluttering and pricing it right. But even though agents repeat it regularly, it doesn't always stick. Some sellers brush it off, while others assume it's optional.
According to a Realtor.com article, there's a noticeable uptick in sellers staying home during showings and open houses — a trend that can make a home much harder to sell.
This isn't just about buyer comfort. It's about psychology, strategy, and giving your home the best possible chance to shine.
Why Sellers Think They Should Stay
While it seems like common knowledge within the real estate world, that doesn't mean the average homeowner knows — or fully understands — it. Most people don't sell homes all that often. So when a seller decides to stick around during a showing, it's not necessarily defiance. It's often rooted in logic that, on the surface, seems sound. Here are some of the most common justifications:
- "Who better to answer questions than me?"
- "I want to point out all the updates I've made."
- "It's still my home — I should be allowed to be here."
- "What if something gets stolen?"
- "I have pets, kids, or someone who can't be left alone."
- "It's just an open house. I'll stay in the background."
New circumstances have added fuel to this trend too. Security concerns after headline-making scams, more people working remotely without flexibility to step away, tight schedules, and high expectations in a fast-moving market are all making it more common today than in the past.
But even with understandable reasons, staying home during a showing often does more harm than good.
Why You Shouldn't Stick Around
Buyers need space — not just physically, but emotionally. Walking through a home is when they start picturing their furniture in the living room, their dog in the yard, their kids at the kitchen counter. That kind of imagining only happens when they feel at ease, and it's nearly impossible to relax and explore freely when the seller is sitting on the couch (or worse, following them from room to room).
When sellers are home during showings or open houses, buyers often stay quiet about real concerns, rush the visit, feel tense or watched, and may even try to read the seller's emotions and motivation — which can shift negotiating power in ways that don't favor the seller. Even a quiet, well-meaning seller's presence can create a real barrier between a buyer and their future home.
Tips for Getting Out While Your Home Is on the Market
Yes, leaving your house for showings can be inconvenient. But with a little preparation, it can be manageable — and even beneficial for your own peace of mind.
Many homeowners just hop in the car and drive around the block until they see the buyers have left. It's a step up from sitting in an idling car watching from down the street, but it's still a waste of time when you could be spending it more productively:
- Run errands — grocery list, pharmacy, dry cleaner
- Work remotely elsewhere — coffee shops, libraries, co-working spots
- Go for a walk or hit the gym — burn off stress and get fresh air
- Meet up with someone — a coffee break or lunch makes the time pass quickly
- Coordinate timing — ask your agent for a heads-up when a showing is wrapping up
- Set designated showing hours if leaving all the time isn't feasible — though limited access can reduce your pool of interested buyers and potentially extend how long your home stays on the market
- Make the home easy to show — the more available and well-priced your home is, the faster it's likely to sell, meaning fewer showings overall
But If You Absolutely Have to Be There
Sometimes life doesn't allow for total flexibility. If staying home during a showing is unavoidable, you can still create space for buyers to explore:
DO:
- Stick to one area of the home (a home office, sunroom, or backyard)
- Be brief and friendly if you encounter the buyers
- Make yourself as invisible as possible and avoid interrupting
DON'T:
- Offer a tour or follow buyers from room to room
- Try to "sell" the home with your commentary or enthusiasm
- Eavesdrop or hover in the background
The goal is to be present without being in the way, and to avoid influencing the buyer's impression in any direction.
What We See Locally
What we tell our sellers is this: agents are always looking for an edge for their clients. A buyer's agent will often try to start a casual, friendly conversation with a seller who's home, hoping to learn more about your situation and motivations — anything that could help their buyer negotiate better. It rarely feels like an interrogation; it usually just feels like small talk. That's exactly what makes it effective, and exactly why we coach our sellers on it directly.
So even if you have to be there, our advice is simple: if you're addressed, a polite greeting is enough. Don't go beyond that. Anything you share, even something that feels harmless, could end up working against you at the negotiating table.
The Takeaway
Some sellers feel like they should — or at least should be able to — stay home when buyers come to see the house, and more and more are choosing to do just that. But while it might seem harmless or even helpful, being present during showings can actually work against the sale. Buyers need space to explore, ask questions, and picture themselves living there — and that's hard to do when the seller is watching from the corner of the room.
The best thing a seller can do is step out and give buyers room to connect with the home. It may feel like a small thing, but it can make a big difference in helping the home sell quickly and smoothly.
Getting ready to list and want help thinking through the logistics of showings? We're happy to help you plan it out. Get started →
Related reading: Should You Hire a Paint Color Consultant Before Selling Your Home?